Boss

It is not the father’s role to let his son know who is boss.

It is not the mother’s duty to explain to her daughter who the leader is.

It is the mother’s role to lead by example, by putting the father first. This is what shows their sons who is the boss.

It is the father’s duty to show his girls that mother comes first. This puts the girls in their own place.

Watch out for your roles in your romantic relationships, because what might seem seemingly innocent to the human eye, can have an extraordinary and long-lasting impact on building, molding and setting future behaviours.

Society is created through conditioned beliefs and these stem from relationships- primarily from those watched, lived and expressed in our marital home.

Whether married, separated, living under the same roof or divorced, it is your duty of care to set a good example to your daughters and sons.

If we do not want petty little people pleasers, fake arrogant little adults or cold, aloof, party boys, who grow up to be unhealthy grown-ups, we ought to show them a good example at home.

Bossy girls and party boys aren’t born, they are created.

They stem from their parent’s inability to put God first and their relationship in the Temple. The Temple of love, surrender, cooperation, understanding and awareness.

No offense, no judgement, no condemnation and no disrespect, but education starts at our nest first.

Bossy girls are domineering, they berate, gossip and put themselves first. They have no mercy and apparently may seem innocent, kind and gentle, but inside they are holding anger, hatred and bitter low self-esteem. Nobody ever put them in their place because they were put up by their father, who chose them as their first.

Putting the mother as the second best shows the girl that she can get away with anything they choose to express. This is sometimes disguised using hidden manipulation, which is not stopped by the father’s God-sent role. Too worried about gaining his daughter’s approval and praise, he will do anything that takes not to lose her. This includes putting her first, even before her mother and stepmother as well.

Cold, aloof party boys may seem indifferent and hard to get but only because they have been taught that they matter more than their dad’s role and respect. If the mother isn’t aware of her parenting, in choosing her little boy over her man, she will help create an unhealthy lad.

Boys need healthy fathers. Not dads who are abusive, controlling and domineering only to try and show that they are the boss of the house, but instead gentle, firm men who can act with self-control and surrendered to their wife’s God-sent role.

When both man and woman surrender to one another, the dance they can dance is amazing to watch. Especially by their little boys and girls.

Children are great teachers, but they are wonderful learners of hidden messages and agendas as well.

When we show our girls and boys a healthy relationship at home, we are setting them to succeed in their own interpersonal relationships. Whether they choose to have a partner, remain celibate or date different women and men, that is not for us to decide or interfere with.

It is though extremely important that we set them the right example at home. If we offer them a healthy role model of father and mother living co-dependently at home, children will learn a great example that will help them with their future interactions when they grow old.

If, on the contrary, we base our romantic relationships on the egotistical power struggle, dominance, control, exertion of power and abusive control, these will be repeated one way or another when they grow up.

Sometimes the impact is subtle, but the consequences never stay behind. They are projected onto the future and keep the same unhealthy example of co-dependent romantic relationships lived over and over again.

As a society and most importantly, as parents, guardians, carers and guides of our younger generations, we have the responsibility to sit with our emotions, gain awareness and self-control and release that which is not healthy for either ourselves or for our daughters and sons.

We are all in this together and our children imitate our silent voice. Those messages that are not always verbally intended, the criticism in our inner head, our silent treatments, hidden abuse, our manipulation and coercion when we try to control somebody else.

This society is meant to live in freedom because Humanity came here as One and in this expression in Oneness, God can experience Itself through us all.

As individuals and in romantic relationships, we can show our kids who the boss is. The boss is not ego but God- our Inner Guidance, our silent voice. The boss is the leader of our hearts, the silent messages we get when we contemplate and get outside our minds. When we are able to surrender to this, we are able to live in Oneness with God. This means surrendering to our relationships but keeping up the guard so as to set healthy boundaries that will aid everyone in setting their own.

No power struggle, no control, no hidden agendas or coercion into shame, guilt or a forced outcome.

The ego will keep us stuck in survival, but God will lift us up into faith and love.

Ultimately it is your own choice and it takes awareness to be able to realize there is no choice but love.

I pray that you may find the courage to leave an unhealthy relationship if you are not able to find and follow your God-sent role.

I pray, that you too may find a healthy relationship in which you can both give and receive love.

I also pray and cherish the idea of co-creating a healthy structure- a #newtemplateofrelationship that can aid us in moving forward with courage, might and love, closer to God Source.

If you are willing to see the consequences of living a life surrendered to Source, get in touch! We can help you reach a healthy romantic relationship in which your values will be respected, your voice will be heard, your needs will be met and your necessities met with curiosity and tender awareness. It takes hard work, but what does not?

A.